PHUKY PHUN!

on my phukin' stereo - Deee-Lite/sampladelic relics... @ [03:59 p.m.] on Wednesday, 12-11-02

The wierdest thing happened. I went to the nearest ethnic grocery store to buy eggs (i'm gonna make fairy cakes tonight) and it was as if i stepped into a whole other country. A year and a half on this block, and i've never set foot there. Amazing such a treasure was situated so close to my living quarters. Screw flying to exotic places, just check out the shady stores located nearest you! I believe it to be Russian. The customers before me even payed with non-american dollars! and no one spoke english! This creepy moustache man kept following me around. Probably thought i was somekind of kid-thief. And there was a row of bins filled with strange candy (i think). I bought 3 different ones based on packaging.

I think i will rip off the designs and dub them my own. Cuz isn't that was us Americans do best? live off the fruits and endeavors of the lesser (wo)man... I have yet to open them, but going by my animal instincts (smell), i guess them to be some sort of chocolate/nutty variety. Maybe i'll let Dy be the guinea pig. Bon appetite!

on my phukin' stereo - random punk-ska cd i mixed @ [04:56 p.m.] on Tuesday, 12-10-02

I went walking around my hood today for about an hour. On this mission of exploration, I got:
1. harrassed by latino carpenters 3x
2. almost stepped in dog shite 2x
3. saw 7 places for rent
4. felt my lungs silently fill with the filthy soup that is LA air.
5. noticed that i was the only one wearing shorts

But the last, i should have known. I mean, this is SoCal, and right now, it's a chilly 67 for these los angelinos. Today on Mtv, they had a making of the video-game for 2Towers. I am excited for this. I am excited for the movie and everything about it, but i hate seeing little snipets of the movie. This is called teasing and only makes me aggitated. I want to be stunned by the whole enchilada. Nay-nay, i say... I also seem to have a fondness for listing things. I'll have to make a list of that.

on my phukin' stereo - Golden Boy/or' @ [12:57 p.m.] on Monday, 12-09-02

I played and crushed Dy last nite on Soulcaliber, winning 7 out of 9 matches. Then i took his ass to skol on Bust-a-Move, scoring 45-6. I'd say he was a good sport bout it, cuz he knows there are a lot more things he could beat me at. For he frequently corrects me in my blunders and points out my mistakes. To be burdened by such genius, i appreciate my bliss in ignorance.

on my phukin' stereo - Ladytron/light&magic @ [10:25 p.m.] on Saturday, 12-07-02

Bin in OC tuday and am very contemplative about my life right now. Things I realized on my trip to Vegas:

1. I like roulette but am not a lucky gambler
2. I like Dy more then I thought, but we don't have much in common
3. I am psudo ditzy
4. Seeing my boy get a lap dance (payed for by his boss) really hurts
5. I like sour martinis
6. To sleep peacefully, I need a bed to myself

This trip put into perspective this whole relationship i'm in. It makes me so emo that i feel like punching things to counter my 'weakness'. On numerous occasions, I felt like crying when I looked at him in the hotel lobby with no reason to. And, NO, it's not that 'time of the month'. Nizzle, please. My only explaination is that my subconscious knows something my conscious doesn't. As if i'm really gonna leave this awful city and move away next year.

I've hung out with him since thursday and will not call him tonight. (he already called once and actually came over when i was still in OC with Mong and Mr. Eff)If he calls again, then he does, but i feel no reason to make contact. This is not a stupid girly mind game, for there is a reason i feel this way. This is probably unfair to him, because he doesn't realize the uneasiness i feel. But i believe that space is the key.

I am not myself when i am with him and i don't like it.

on my phukin' stereo - ***nothing*** @ [09:48 a.m.] on Thursday, 12-05-02

Leaving for Las Vegas!
Staying at the Bay, gonna see the cheezy 'Tournament of Kings", plan to get smashed with Dy and all his Brit. coworkers. Boy, can they drink...

on my phukin' stereo - Dj Cam/one of many i own @ [01:35 a.m.] on Tuesday, 12-03-02

To keep my imagination active, I've been making up stories to myself about the other people that live in my apartment building that i run into regularly. This one lady intrigues me to no end. She drives a silver convertible Mercades, and always wears fur. Whenever i share an elevator with her, she always compliments me on my ensemble and touches me. Not in that 'point to where the bad stranger touched you-vibe', but in a foreign fashionista' way. Given her bold approach to style, i believe she's a fashion editor for some hip Armenian magazine. After the brief encounters with moi, she runs to her appartment and quickly jolts down all the inspiration i give to her. I am her elevator muse of textile and have saved her from the icky bohemian/hippie trend.

Viva my uber-long scarf!!!

on my phukin' stereo - King of the Hill (on in the tele) @ [07:44 p.m.] on Sunday, 12-01-02

*sigh* *sigh-sigh-sigh*
Today, me and Dy went to the Getty. Been in LA for 2 years and it's the first time i've been there. Cho sugoii! I love the buildings and the such... The place reeked of money and i loved it. Dy said i have a 'problem' cuz since he got back on Saturday, i've been bugging him to go shopping, and his reply, every time, was "my girl needs to get a job..." His girl doesn't have a job too? i have to meet her one of these days.. tee-hee* he just doesn't understand a girl's need to collect items of cuteness for people and herself. In a way, he's doing a good thing, cuz i definitely dont have money to burn this year...

Oh, and he took a pict of me on his digi cam before he left to Virginia. Survey of his friends and family says that i'm 90% cute, 10% 12-year old girl. I love his people.

i wish to write something more profound in this entry, but i'm kind of tired from all the walking and my mind has turned to dookie. All i know is Ghirardelli hot chocolate-mocha is bliss*.

on my phukin' stereo - the Dandy Warhols/come down... @ [12:26 a.m.] on Thursday, 11-28-02

So the interview went nicely, but basically the chica told me to do a major overhaul on my blase resume. THUS, i have been totally motivated to do a kick-bootie design. Unfortunately, i lack much skillz in typographical layouting koolness... and like i said before, when it rains, it's floods & i received ANOTHER mysterious email from ANOTHER design agency called CreativeCircle (or some shite like that) which requested an online portfolio (which i have none).

Sooo......
In a frenzy of creativity, motivation, caffeine-rushing, and hope, i started working on an online site to house my works/art. So far, this is the 2nd layout design (which i'm liking more! ^_^) that was a bitch figuring out the popups and window dimensions. Have to keep telling myself, 'i'm not a web designer and it's pretty good considering...' Uploading through crappy AOL makes my pictures look like shite, but it's a start. Maybe if i build it right, i'll feel more confident about my stuff, and someday get my own place in this great big WWW...

Tomorrow, uh i mean today is Turkey Day. Mom's in Vegas, Dad's in Hawaii, Dy's in Virginia, and I'm in Cali. Oh nahh, it's gonna be mad-phoning tomorrow. I think me and Karen are gonna get some Koo-koo-roo's for our own sad little turkey lunch and watch 'Memento'. Mong and Aaron left for Virginia today. They're gonna spend it with Aaron's family. Guess they are getting quite serious! I found it really touching that Mong called me before she left to wish me a Happy Thanksgiving AND to inform me that she drove near the airport and back and to the airport and back and the milage was over 100. So, i'm to inform Mr. Marchal that he was WRONG to accuse me of driving his car and doing that mapquest shite. I guess it bugged her too when i told her bout it. So irrahs...

on my phukin' stereo - some random MoonSka compilation @ [12:45 p.m.] on Monday, 11-25-02

Luck is what you make it, right? Oh kami-sama... I got the interview @ 24-7 set for this afternoon. Praying that all goes well. Serena is super duper nice on the phone, i be she's a super hip kitty...

Just finished the xxx-mas C*ntroversy flyer last nite and i love it to death.. maybe i'll use it as my next month's blog design...

on my phukin' stereo - Sneaker Pimps/ becoming x @ [09:52 p.m.] on Saturday, 11-23-02

I hate it. I hate feeling like a piece of shit, but i do. I hate it that i'm getting so emotional over stupid, things that shouldn't bother me. I hate not being able to hang out with friends and treat them to coffee, or tip them generously when they hook me up with tasty tea. And i hate not being able to go to a club to have fun when i haven't been to one in along time all because i'm TOO FUCKING BROKE...

i feel so helpless and that i failed somewhere. Maybe i have too much pride, and feel that i must make myself feel much worst then the situation really is, so that i would never again be in this predicament. And there have been many times that i felt like i was about to crack and start crying because if it. It hurts that much.

This nasty aura has surrounded me the past 4 days, and i have a sinking feeling that it's not going away, so i'll have to...

on my phukin' stereo - Le Tigre @ [12:22 p.m.] on Friday, 11-22-02

My horoscope for this month says that today is suppose to be my 'ULTRA-LUCKY-DAY'. Money is suppose to poor from the sky as well as pop up from every orfice of my body (kinky!) But, i am running on low self-esteem mode and cannot fathom such luckiness happening. First off, i called EDD to see if i can extend my UE, and it was a definite 'NO'. Then i applied once again to Amoeba's and such others that use to offer me jobs in my prime. Damn, when you got it, you got it; but when you don't, it's like you're a piece of poo and no one wants to touch u.

i keep on thinking that maybe i should expose myself to the elements and walk around outside (even if it's only in a cirle) to wait for the sparkley gold from the sky to befall on my person. And i would be generous and give a couple of coins to the next bum that asks me for beer change.~~~

on my phukin' stereo - FLCL/st @ [11:50 a.m.] on Thursday, 11-21-02

My gut feeling that Dy doesn't trust me has been growing stronger with every day. Spending time together is filled with uneasiness. I don't know why, but an invisible shield has surrounded me, and i think he knows it. The last time i saw him, there was this sadness in his eyes due to the fact that whenever he made a motion to touch me i'd either flinch or pull away. These actions occur out of reflex more then repulsion. The 'hurting' is starting...

on my phukin' stereo - Dj Cam/abstract manifesto @ [12:05p.m.] on Monday, 11-18-02

What a filled weekend! But filled with what? U decide...

FRIDAY - had a 'french evening' with Dy as we ate at Cafe du'Ville and watched Amelie. Was kind of sad that he didn't share more of his fille mignon with moi. Also he was wearing a white tee that said that didn't belong to him, but when i did HIS LAUNDRY, i folded it in his shite, so he decided to wear it. All through the nite he made snide remarks about my new friend & doing the 'other boyfriend's' laundry too. It sort of ticked me off.

SATURDAY - saw Harry Potter with a shite load of children. At nite, attended Dalek & Richard Colman's Artist Reception at BlackMarket's Gallery. Hella full of scenesters and the "LA Cool" (gag). Shepard Fairey also made a smilie appearence. I was sort of impressed by their stuff, and yet not; as though i've seen it all before. Sorry to say, but there was a low level of originality in the art. Then me and Dy sort of had a fight at the place about a bunch of shite and how he didn't offer me more meat (last nite's dinner). i swear, that boy is selfish when it comes to food. Mong said that always sharing food is an Asian upbringing and the houlie boys NEVER do that kind of shite. Then Dy said to me "I thought you don't play those girl mind games." & i retorted," My DAD ALWAYS gives me what ever is on his plate then eats after ME! It's showing love!" "Well, i'm not your dad." was all he said. (grrrrrr) Then we left to go to McD's and he bought fries and DIDN'T offer me. I was bitter tha whole nite, but held it in to fuel my revenge. Not wanting to feel like old people, (since it was only 11pm~ish) we went over to Mong's and played some scrabble. i sucked, ofcourse and the winner was Mong (it was actually Andy with a very good double word made in the last round using his "X" on a double letter space, but i don't wanna blaze his glory in this entry).

SUNDAY - ate some baguette with brie, grapes, and salami while watching Brotherhood of the Wolves (it sortof, no wait, yeah it did suck ass). That nite, Rod came to pick up his very cute, halitosis, lumpy, clicking, hacking dog, DimSum and gave me a SpaceBaby tee. Then it was mad vaccuming and laundry doing to get rid of all the dog sheddings. Wah.

on my phukin' stereo - Chicks on Speed/rereleases of ... @ [03:32 p.m.] on Friday, 11-15-02

3hours - gaming (Frequency & JGR)
2hours - t.v (an otter gave birth)
2hours - computer (job hunting sux)
.5hour - dog walking (and pooping)
.5hour - food (brie, and grapes)
.2hour - phone (gabbing w/ Rudi)
--------------------------------
dying slowly of boredom...

but looking forward to seeing Harry Potter like the geek i am.

on my phukin' stereo - Le Tigre @ [09:53 a.m.] on Thursday, 11-14-02

The 3rd straight day i've been getting up round 7-ish. Starting to feel normal again in that i can cram soo many hours of nothingness into a day instead of my 'usual' sleep for 11hrs bum days. This is getting ridiculous and i need to find work real soon. Being broke sucks but having to put off a potential job/agency interview for the 5th time sucks even more. For real, i'm not even putting anymore energy into this company at all.
If i did have money to burn, i'd be trying to score some shoes from Ewan McGregor, Stella McCartney, Jay Kay, and Sir Ben Kingsley.

Last nite me and Karen watched the extended version of the Lord of the Rings. Then we watched the Weta studios workshop footage of how they built all the props and miniatures. It caused our brains to overload. Damnit! i wanna work there!!! It was SOOOOO fuking amazing how anally detailed they were...

Dy found a eggy lump thing on DimSum's side. He said it's a tumor. Poor thing, i have to let Rod know bout his baby.

on my phukin' stereo - At the Drive In @ [02:40 p.m.] on Tuesday, 11-12-02

Just gave Dim a bath and she hates me now. I'm depressed & am gonna make muffins now.

on my phukin' stereo - Blur/modern life is rubbish @ [02:30 a.m.] on Monday, 11-11-02

Oooooh! Mong and I are exposed on Synthetic's site.

I find myself strangely drawn to plastic surgery shows on the health channel. It's not that i wanna sport a new nose or get my thighs slimmed, i'm just completely captivated in watching these people go through all this shite to look younger. Then again, i could also be some sadistic freak. I also find it close to miraculous how some doctors can restore normality to those in accidents who need it to roam 'normally' in society. Karen had her back towards the tv the whole nite.

Thank you Et-chan for sharing THIS with me. The illest shite to date!

on my phukin' stereo - Saves the Day/stay what you are @ [02:19 p.m.] on Thursday, 11-07-02

Everyone. Meet my newest love. His name is Oscar.

on my phukin' stereo - NIN/downward spiral @ [01:30 p.m.] on Wednesday, 11-06-02

my obsessive compulsive behaviour has been kickin in and i can't stop thinking bout certain things. one thing that really ticks me off is the way Andy treats me like a kid. That whole car issue has blown up to such a mess. So when i went to pick him up at the LAX on friday, he drove the way back and accused me of riding round town in his car while he was away. i told him no, the only place i went was to J-town after i dropped him off on monday. He then points out that there was 100 miles added to the milage (i seriously dont know how that happened). then i countered, ya know, we took freeways and i stopped of at jtown, so maybe it was around 100 (hello baka-thea? i have no judgement of distances). we come back to my place, and the baka goes into my room and turns on my computer. i asked him what was he doing and he replied that he was gonna check mapquest to find out how many miles it was to the airport. turns out it was only 14 miles from my place and it made me look like a big fat liar, WHICH I'M NOT! grrrrrrrrrrrrr... and a couple of other stuff that's been happening are starting to sketch me out a bit...

In other mind rants, I have the uncanny ability to make the Vines latest video appear on MTV2. I sort of spooked Karen out a bit last nite.

on my phukin' stereo - Miss Kitten & the Hacker @ [05:05 p.m.] on Tuesday, 11-05-02

Last nite was extra-ordinary. I took Karen to Elena La Bua's spring/summer'03 fashion show. It was held on the rooftop of the Standard hotel in downtown LA and i was blown away by congregation of fashion hipsters. Immediate Odd Wallflower Syndrome kicked in and we felt invisible. After buying Karen a coke and myself a jack/coke (bill equaling a fuk me 13$) we settled on a cushiony seat that was shared by a girl with an adorable maltise. The little foo-foo thing came and shimmied it's body inbetween me and Karen for warmth and snuggled down for the count. Between my jacket and jeans, a strip of my body was exposed to its soft fur. And inside, we both died a happy death to be able to mingle with the only animal in the joint.

I spotted Rami and Ernest and we went to stand by them under the heat lamps to watch the runway. Soon Saam appeared in all her amazon glory, modeling the spring line. Yay! We stuck around later to give her props then split the scene due to uncomfortability. On the way down stairs, we encountered the 'summer' line (Jacky, you'd love it. electro-80's in full effect) and had our own brief showing within the minute. Oh what a nite.

on my phukin' stereo - Tosca/opera @ [01:27 p.m.] on Monday, 11-04-02

The Strokes rocked. Nick (my huzban) on the guitar rocked. Can't wait for the next album to rock. Read our nite's event @ Rudi's cuz i'm wicked and i'm lazy. Dy bought us tickest to see Cinema Electronica at the Resfest where i got to see Golden Boy's video, Rippin' Kittin (*purrs in bliss*). As a devotion of love and gratitued, i went over to his place and cleaned his room. Aren't we cute?

on my phukin' stereo - Sonic Youth/washing machine @ [06:48 p.m.] on Friday, 11-01-02

who's bad ass? i'm bad ass. for making a site that's bad ass.